The brief answer to this is “Yes! Of course they can!” At one time it was more traditional to find that dating was restricted to the under 20s who hadn’t yet found a partner to settle down with. At the same time marriages seemed the order of the day, and divorce was rare. Despite older people often feeling that attitudes haven’t changed, the culture certainly has and today you are likely to find single people of all ages out on the dating scene looking for a serious relationship – along with a few who are only looking for a good time and have no intention of settling down!
One of the main negative aspects of dating over the age of 40 that has to be overcome is the perception of the dater themselves. If they believe that they’ll be out in a room full of strangers, all of them half their age, then they aren’t going to have the right attitude for entering that room. It’s quite possible that if you are going somewhere for the first time, that you will find yourself amongst a lot of younger people, but if you stop focusing on the younger ones long enough, you’ll find that there are people of your age there also – and even older.
There are people over 40 are who still looking for first time love. For professional or personal reasons they never got around to finding a steady relationship early on and had almost given up finding a partner before discovering that age is no longer a social barrier on the dating scene. Then there are other over 40s who have had the traditional relationship, wedding, children, etc and then found out years down the road that it was a relationship doomed to disaster if only they’d listened to their instincts right at the beginning. Now they’re back looking to see if love will give them a second chance.
The most attractive quality that an over 40 year old on the dating scene can have is confidence. Even if you’re feeling out of your league, you have to muster up every experience life has thrown at you, hold your head up and say with confidence “I’m here because I want to be here” and walk into the room as if you truly believe it. Don’t sink into the nearest empty table, go to the bar and slink into a bar stool instead. Your age is far from your enemy. Your age gives you years of experience in people watching. From the vantage point of the bar you can observe other people, who’s on their own, who’s talking to anybody and everybody, who’s touching up anybody and everybody, and so on. You can also check out if there’s anyone in the room that you find attractive and watch how they interact with others.
Don’t feel that being over 40 puts you in a “loser” category as far as dating goes. Even if you’re back on the dating scene as a result of a failed relationship, at least you’ve got the courage to get back out there. It’s not easy, but once you’ve been out a few times, you’ll find that you might even begin to enjoy it and wonder why you never did it sooner!
By: Edward Bennett-26386
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