Thursday, January 22, 2009

Why Chinese guys choose their brides from Russia.

When a Russian girl from city of Komsomolsk-on-Amur was going to Harbin for studying, she could not assume finding her destiny there.

As a beginning, four years ago 25-years-old Marina Kushnarenko decided to study the Chinese language. In Heyluntszyan State University girl was persuaded to give Russian language lessons to one of the employee. Soon she noticed that her student is not so much interested in Russian verbs, but his pretty teacher. "Malina",as Chinese friend called the girl, was not going to stay in China, so decided to stop the advances fundamentally. But Chzhunven was persistent. When he had told her about his love, Marina already was fairly speaking Chinese. It's the language young family communicates today.

- He bribed me with his reliability, a serious attitude to life, family - she recalls one year after the wedding.

"New dwellers of Harbin"

Settled down in Harbin, Marina had established relationships with compatriots, and after a while headed the Russian club. In the city with Russian history there is a lot of people from the former Soviet Union. There are about 200 mixed marriages.

With the help of Russian Club, new dwellers of Harbin from Russia retain connections with the old-timers - children and grandchildren of immigrants of the first and second waves.

- We want to unite the compatriots - our heroine says. - We make tours on the historic Harbin, lay flowers to the monument to Soviet soldiers and organize action "St George Ribbon" on the Victory Day, we put in order the territory of the Holy Iverskiy Temple (General Kappel, associate of Alexander Kolchak was buried here). And if possible, we make parcels to the Russian prisoners that are in Chinese prisons...

But now the deals of club are on the second plan. Since four months ago the family has a son Timur and Marina holds most of the time at home.

Oddly, Chzhunven dreamed of a daughter. In China, the law prohibits making ultrasound and find out in advance the gender of the child. It is linked to the fact that young couples get rid of unborn girls. Incidentally, the Chinese one-child policy does not apply to international families, so it is possible that little Timur will have a brother or sister.

Marina by her own experience convinced that the stories about the caring Chinese fathers - are not a myth.

- Here in Cina, the men have a lot of responsibilities in family. But I am probably more lucky, Chzhunven has good character - she admits. - He comes from work and washes the diapers, he can cook dinner or clean the apartment. In short, he does not object to any housework, no problem.

No discords for the food - wife cooks Russian dishes, her husband cooks Chinese.

The interpreter and journalist Jana, Chinese girl accompanied us the visiting, once said how gently spouses address to each other:

- In our families we do not call the husband "dear, sweet." We call so the children only. But Marina is producing this so naturally...

The difference of mental experiences has been balanced by common values - they both cherish family and believe that the most important is understanding and respect. Well, if you have found a common language in the main point then a different upbringing, skin color and shape of eyes are no longer relevant, young people feel sure.

Prestigious wife

When I was going to arise for visit, I called Marina, she, unlike most Russian wives, had not been objected. Usually our girls go on about the Chinese men, who for some reason do not wish to advertise the family routine and avoid the journalists. When we met, it became clear that Marina settles all in the family.

To the question: "Who is the "boss" of the house?" the husband having no reflection points on his beloved.

As the interpreter Jana said, in China it is agreed that the current affairs of the family have been decided by the wife, and serious problems - by both spouses.

It is prestigious to have a Russian wife in the Celestial. And Chzhunven confesses not without the pride that friends envy him. When spouses walking along with little Timur, passersby look at an international family with interest and well-dispose, that incidentally, can not be said about the attitude to Russian-Chinese families in our homeland...

Marina does not cease thought of returning home. This is a sore point for her. But so far, she says it is not possible. The reason is not the ignorance of her husband the Russian language and consequently the inevitable problems with the work. Russian wife is afraid to move her Chinese husband to her motherland, because she is not confident in his safety.

- I will simply be afraid to let a spouse leave the home - the girl says frankly.

Little Timur, as well his mother, has Russian citizenship. In this case it is easier to obtain documents to travel to Russia, and Marina is going to spend the summer with her parents in the Khabarovsk district.

The difficulties of translation

The walls of the kitchen in three-room apartment, which is bought out from University by Chzhunven, are decorated with Russian alphabet. It turned out that Marina's mother-in-law began to study Russian language in order to better understand her daughter in law. Grandmother and grandfather came here every night to help nurse the grandson.

The son's decision to marry Russian girl caught them as a surprise, but they did not object. Just wanted to know what she is in the eastern horoscope. And, having learned that the girl was born in the year of goat, noted with a happy: "Goat and Cat is a good union." Now the parents are helping her to get along with life in a foreign country and of course, respect her for having learned their language.

According to our heroine, she has not a traditional Chinese family. In the China it is agreed that all major decisions concerning the child are taken by grandmother (husband's mother). But Marina as soon as learned that she was pregnant immediately placed on all the dots above "i". She told relatives that she herself will care about a child.

Chinese women are with children up to three months, after this the child is given to nurse or grandmother. Marina decided not to rush to work, the salary of her husband provides the family of the average standard of living.

- We are well fed, everything is cheap here, and what is most important we can afford to fly to Russia and to rest in the Chinese resorts - the girl says.

In her prospect there is the trip to home, meeting with relatives. Chzhunven with his visa will be able to stay with Russian kinsfolks not longer than two weeks. Then he will come back to Harbin to be waiting for his Malina...

Anna Hamatova, professor, director of the Institute of East of FESU:

- The Chinese are getting married foreign dirls (not only Russian women) primarily because of the country's one-child policy, at the same time the international family can have two or more children. In addition, in the country ther is artificially created situation where men prevail over the women. So there are the problems in the Chinese population, in other words, our neighbors do not have enough their own brides.

There is another feature there. The Chineses are educated in a spirit of teamwork, opposed to, say so, personalizators - the Americans, that is why there is the cult of the family in China. The man, based on the canons of Confucianism, is obliged to take care of his wife and children, that is in our understanding a reliable man's shoulder... We have many girls students, which having a period of trial in China, entered into marriages with Chinese men. Another issue - whether the girls can stay in this country forever?

Articles On Russian Brides

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Singles Name The Best Countries For Dating Good Looking People.

In any country, there are good looking people and average looking people. Singles are an ideal group to ask just which country produces the best dating opportunities and the best looking people in general.

The following comments relate to a general concencious, and are real, actual comments from singles who have posted in our forums and have freely offered their opinions. We have summarised the overall opinions of dozens of singles from our internet dating site partner.

How singles viewed the English:
Opionions varied considerably. English people often have attractive traits which can be attributed to their accent, charm and humor.

How singles viewed the Italians:
The italians are well regarded for their good dress sense, handsome men and beautiful women.

How singles viewed the Brazillians:
Brazillians are seen as one of the best looking groups in the world. A recent poll in Rolling Stone magazine also suggests this could well be true.

How singles viewed the Japanese:
Certainly, males who are fans of Asian women expressed a view that there are loads of hot Japanese women and they are also considered good wife material.

How singles viewed the Polish:
Polish women are considered natural Beauties, and also rank among the best looking in the world. Polish women possess something that you just cant quite put your finger on.

How singles viewed the French:
The French are seen as sophisticated, sexy and romantic all rolled up into one very attractive package. The French have a reputation for being alittle vain however, with polling group BVA claiming 80% of French people are self proclaimed good lookers.

How singles viewed the Russians:
Russians, much like their Ukraine cousins, are yet another genetically blessed country. Whilst the phrase beautiful does not genuinely capture the phenomenon. The women many singles recollect are extraordinarily, incredibly, spectacularly gorgeous.

How singles viewed the Australians:
The Australians were viewed as friendly and having a laid back body beautiful, sexy, beach/outdoors culture.

How singles viewed the Germans:
The Germans did not rate highly in the looks department, so in that respect there is no data indicating that Germans were viewed as good lookers. As we know however there are always individual exceptions with any country.

How singles viewed the Dutch:
In the looks department, the Dutch had some good feedback, although many were considred rude and ignorant.

The views expressed in this article are not neccessarily the opinion of the writer, but a sumarised general view of singles who have researched the physical attributes of people from various countries.

By: Matt F

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Wednesday, January 14, 2009

How To Make No Mistake When Choosing Clothes Or... Wife.

Searching a life partner on dating sites, we often find ourselves in the same position as a buyer in a huge store with a large assortmentom. We face one and the same problem there - the problem of choice. Or in other words - the problem of clarity of purpose. If the objective is quite clear, that is half the success. The likelihood of a good choice in this case is 50/50. And if the process of selection will be also correct, then the full success is guaranteed. There is an easy way (or tool) by which it is easy to determine the correct choice, which you will never regret later. The tool is always "on hand" and it does not misfire. This is your innate intuition (by the other definitions - soul). Each of us had used it many times in the life, being not always aware of this...

The clearest and simplest example, as well the training of the ability to define your goals at the same time is finding the necessary clothing for you. Do please recall, there have been cases where you bought seems to be the appropriate thing, but later it turns out that you stop like it or it is not suitable, or has a defect. And it had happened that you have seen something, bought it immediately without hesitation and are happy with it for today. The difference between those things is that one of them is someone's else, and the second one is yours.

The first thing that seemed appealing to you, was intended for another person, but not for you. Perhaps you saw it on a friend or a mannequin. If the thing looks good on the other man, it yet does not mean that it will go for you. And this is not your weakness but your dignity. It is very bad to be a mannequin, on which everything looks good. It is not the generally beauty makes the strong impression but the stressed individuality.

I aware that all of this you know very well without me. However you go shopping for a long time and agonize, not knowing what to buy. Knowledge of styles, fashion sense, even a good taste, it does not help you. After long searches, you are still not entirely satisfied with the acquired thing. In order to always find exactly what you need you have to learn how to distinguish your goods from someone's else ones. How is it done? You will not believe how simple is it!

First, never torture yourself with the problem of choice. Since you are clearly in violation of the balance. The more you tighten on this, the worse the result will be. You do not need to examine things and analyze their advantages and disadvantages for a long time. The reason should not participate in process of choice because the mind and it's thoughts is not YOU, but the swoop from the influence of "the commonly established views", from advertising finally. Just go and see like in the exhibition, nothing thinking.

First, you have to be clear about yourself in general terms, what would you like to buy. It is not necessarily to represent the details. The only description is to be the type of clothing. For example, if you need a coat, just put a goal to choose a coat, and no more extra conditions. Let your soul choose - it is much closer to what YOU actually ARE. It will not miss the slightest detail and always tell you in time on your thing. You will learn about it as soon as among the many things you will see and rather feel the only one that inspires you a special liking.

Once again I repeat, you do not need to analyze why do you like the thing. You just like it and you can say about it «this is the right thing I need». You will buy it without thinking.

Even if you're looking for it for a long time and you can not find it, no doubt, there is your thing in a some store. If there is not in the third one, then in the tenth store you can find it. It patiently waits for you so that you also be patient, do not thrash about, do not torture yourself with a doubt and do not reproach yourself. And to make the confidence absolute, I'll reveal the secret of distinguisher between other's thing and yours one. It is as easy as well.

As I have said, during the selection process, you should not think about the benefits and disadvantages of the thing. But the moment when you must tell the seller your «Yes» or «No» has come. At this time you are very sweet sleeping, even if you think that this is not the case. Your sleep is particularly strong if there are either seller or your friend beside that tells you about the thing.

While you are deciding, your mind only is working. It analyzes the advantages and disadvantages, it builds it's own concept and makes it sound and persuasive, but at the same time it listens to the views of others. The mind is so absorbed into the process, that it really does not pay attention to the feelings of the soul. In this sense, the mind is firmly sleeping.

Let it be, do not disturb it until it takes action. And the decision is made. Attention! At this point, don't listen to anybody, wake up and be aware of: what are the feelings you had when the decision was taken? Was it a condition of mental comfort, or vice versa? The state of mental comfort will show you the attitude of the soul to decision of your mind.

Mental comfort, as you know, can not give you unambiguous answer. The soul does not always knows exactly what it wants and can also vary. If you liked the thing at first sight, and you soon felt it, then the soul said «yes». But afterwards the mind turns on and starts to analyze and justify the choice. If as a result of the analysis your mind also said «yes», it means that the thing yours. If you liked the thing not at first sight, but as a result of rational justification, then you should particularly pay attention to the slightest spiritual discomfort. The soul has a remarkable feature - sometimes it does not always know exactly what it wants, but (Attention!), it always knows exactly what it does not want to! Herein lies the secret of the correct choice.

If you hesitate, if anything in this thing you have is mild anxiety or discomfort, if light shade of doubt or oppression runs - this is not your thing. The mind will start to persuade you and colorfully to paint all the dignities. If you caught yourself on that you are coaxing yourself, trying to convince you that this has both good shape and size as well - you can immediately without regret reject this thing - it is someone's else but not yours.

Unequivocal selection criterion is in one simple phrase: if you have to coax yourself, the thing is someone's else. Do know it: if the thing is yours, you do not have to coax yourself.

And finally, whether in the selection process you should listen to the views of others? I think not. No one except you, will be able to choose your thing. If you liked it unconditionally, you can be absolutely sure that when others will see it from you, they come into raptures.

In conclusion, let's get back to love affairs, to the question of choosing a wife. There is an ancient Eastern parable. At a Bazaar a dervish (peripatetic sage) is siting. Many people apply to him for solving their life problems, and he helps everyone with wise advice. A richly dressed young man approaches, puts a coin in a bowl for donations, and respectfully askes.
- Oh, wise! I really need your advice.
- What's your question?
- The fact is that I am in love. I like a very good and beautiful girl from a respected family and would like to marry her. Give me advise dear, should I marry her or not?
- Do not marry her!
- ???
- If you really wanted to marry her, you would not ask anybody.

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